Thanks Eddie.  You've turned my family and I into DALLAS fanatics (and yes, I'm speaking of the television show from the 80's).  I remember the day when you encouraged me to throw disc one of the first season on my Netflix queue, and, honestly, I thought you were a little crazy for being such a fan of what I thought was some sort of girly soap opera.  ...My oh my, how naive I was.  175+ episodes later (with about another 200+ to go), I can't thank you enough for having introduced me to my favorite TV addiction.

In fact, we're so fanatical about the show that we'll be attending this weekend's 30 year reunion of the entire cast at Southfork Ranch (Yah... we're a little obsessive aren't we?).  But ya know what?  I don't feel like a dork for going.  It's gonna be so damn cool to be able to share a bourbon and branch with the oil tycoon himself, J.R. Ewing.  I also plan on hitting the bottle REAL HARD with Sue Ellen in hopes that I can turn her into an alcoholic again.  As for Bobby... I'll be running him over with my car.  Cliff Barnes will get an earful of mockery outta me for having never conquered J.R. at ANYTHING.  Depending on whether I feel seductive or not, I'll probably ask Lucy to marry me, only to divorce her clingy ass by the end of the night.  And finally, I'm gonna confront Ray Krebbs about why he thought it was appropriate to ram his tongue down his niece's throat.  What was he thinking!?